Tragedy struck Nargis when her husband Naqvi, an air force pilot, was killed as his helicopter crashed in the Siachen glacier. Nargis, who had only studied till class XII, had to take care of her children — son Nihal (4), and daughter Sabiha (3). She resolved to give her children a comfortable life, a dream that she and her husband shared.
But the meagre pension was insufficient for good education. So she decided to graduate; later enrolling for a PG degree, and a teacher's training course, all the time working in temporary teacher's jobs.
Says Nargis, "Naqvi treated me like a queen, but suddenly that queen was on the road. I would have broken down, but for my children." During this period, she also dismissed her relatives' suggestions of remarriage.
Fighting initial despair, she told herself she was a soldier's wife and so should face difficulties. Her husband's colleagues and relatives gave her strength in those hours of crisis. Every night, during dinner, she would talk to her children about Naqvi, as she wanted them to feel that they were not orphans, and "this strengthened our relationship."
But life was a struggle and it took her eight years to get a gas agency for which she was eligible. "If an IAF pilot's wife has to face such a challenge, I wonder the plight of other women in my situation," she says.
Even after she got the gas agency in 1995, local goons laid siege to her agency threatening to `slit the throat' of anybody who dared to enter the premises. But she fought back, telling the female relatives of the gang leader that she was the widow of an IAF pilot, and was being harassed. This worked!
Today, her agency has won awards for excellent service. Sabiha is happily married, while Nihal is studying to be a dental surgeon. Nargis has also become a prominent name in social work in East Delhi and Noida. Says Nargis, "Today, when I see both my kids dealing with life so beautifully, I can't help admiring them.
"My message to women in similar circumstances is: Trust yourself and remember that the more hurdles you cross, the stronger you get."
But the meagre pension was insufficient for good education. So she decided to graduate; later enrolling for a PG degree, and a teacher's training course, all the time working in temporary teacher's jobs.
Says Nargis, "Naqvi treated me like a queen, but suddenly that queen was on the road. I would have broken down, but for my children." During this period, she also dismissed her relatives' suggestions of remarriage.
Fighting initial despair, she told herself she was a soldier's wife and so should face difficulties. Her husband's colleagues and relatives gave her strength in those hours of crisis. Every night, during dinner, she would talk to her children about Naqvi, as she wanted them to feel that they were not orphans, and "this strengthened our relationship."
But life was a struggle and it took her eight years to get a gas agency for which she was eligible. "If an IAF pilot's wife has to face such a challenge, I wonder the plight of other women in my situation," she says.
Even after she got the gas agency in 1995, local goons laid siege to her agency threatening to `slit the throat' of anybody who dared to enter the premises. But she fought back, telling the female relatives of the gang leader that she was the widow of an IAF pilot, and was being harassed. This worked!
Today, her agency has won awards for excellent service. Sabiha is happily married, while Nihal is studying to be a dental surgeon. Nargis has also become a prominent name in social work in East Delhi and Noida. Says Nargis, "Today, when I see both my kids dealing with life so beautifully, I can't help admiring them.
"My message to women in similar circumstances is: Trust yourself and remember that the more hurdles you cross, the stronger you get."
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